Jonathan Meyer.

I have a hard time saying no. Do you want ice cream? Of course I do. Would you help me with this? Sure. Want to go to the Mall of America quick? Why the hell not.

This tendency to say yes and not no, comes with some risks that I am fully aware of. I live a decently healthy lifestyle and avoid situations where I wouldn’t be successful. I can say no to drugs and alcohol, thanks to red ribbon week in elementary school, but productive things are a different story.

As a runner at Wartburg, we take five days off at the end of the outdoor track. Letting the body recover and the mind to be at ease for a little bit is a healthy and necessary thing to do. This break usually lines up for the whole team at the same time, this year it happens next week. Silly thing is, I am taking my break this week. With a slew of subpar races and some frustrating mental hurdles I shut it down a little early.

A staple of our running program is what we call “time trials”. At the end of the season, we set up our own races with the goal of running as fast as possible in a controlled environment with the whole team out watching and supporting.

Being the good teammate I like to think I am, I joined in on the fun. Happy to cheer and clap and have a good time. We had three races going on, music blasting, and our team spread out across the whole stadium.

One of my teammates wanted someone to jog a few laps with him, eventually asking me. Well if you remember from earlier, I can’t say no. Now let me preface, I am not wearing running attire, I’m in crocs, gym shorts, and a Hawwiiann shirt. Before I could think otherwise I was jogging in crocs around our track with Jacob. Crazy right? Well the madness kept up.

Some people joked and yelled “Jon are you racing the 800 dressed like that?”, with that simple phrase spoken into existence, it was on.

The 800 was our last event of the evening and the most popular. Wearing my grey crocs and blue Hawaiian shirt, I stood ready to race in lane 8. Off the line I went straight to the back of our mens pack and realized how I didn’t have much spring or power in my step. Coming through half way I was decently quick yet really tired and not prepared for an effort like that.

By 500 meters I was so nauseous and slowed down to a mere jog, letting the women in the event pass me as I moved to lane two. What had slipped my mind was that this 800 wasn’t about speed, it was about getting a world record on the books. I don’t think anyone has ever intentionally worn the same outfit and shoes that I did and entered into that hard of an effort.

Finishing in a time of 2:37, I proudly claimed the world record in the Croc/Hawwiian shirt 800.

Until my next world record, I’m Just Jonathan.